Commentary: The latest, greatest thing? Beware

Well ladies and gentlemen, it’s a new year, when our thoughts turn to hope for a better world, optimism for a great 12 months ahead, resolutions to personally improve each of our lives, all of that stuff.

But not for me, baby.

To heck with that positivity and cheerfulness. Because I’m all about conspiracies.

Blame the capitalist dynamic of smoke-and-mirrors that seems to drive America in 2015, demanding newfound vigilance.

Let’s start with Apple. Used to be the plucky underdog — remember? — until it found a more dependable business model as the whale of Wall Street. The company makes good stuff. Quality-driven. Innovative.

Did I mention ridiculously expensive? That too.

I am now one of those attached to the Apple world with an iPhone, a Macbook and an iPad. But I curse the company and myself daily for being a part of such an overpriced sham.

Example: I needed a new charge cord the other day. Went into the Apple store and found it selling for $30. But, oh wait, I wanted the piece that plugs into the wall too. That’s another 30 bucks. All told, it’s $60 for hardware that I imagine costs 11 cents to manufacture.

Have you ever broken the screen on your iPhone? That will set you back at least $79 at the local fix-it shop. How about accidentally dropping the phone into the toilet? That’s probably the end of the phone. Costly electronics and water don’t mix in this case.

My point is that Apple can make these things with shatter-resistant screens and waterproof bodies. But it don’t for an obvious reason: Selling the little pieces for the replacement screen, and peddling new iPhones at $600 (and up) a pop retail, generate massive revenue streams for a greedy company whose valuation is already through the ceiling.

This is how you behave when you’re “The Establishment.”

Then again, I am here to tell you that true plucky underdogs rarely, if ever, actually exist anymore, feeding nicely here into my whole conspiracy rant.

Here are two other phenomena that are anything but the grassroots, power-to-the-people ideas that they seem: The taxi-killing app Uber and VRBO, the temporary-lodging website that stands for Vacation Rental By Owner.

You no doubt know how Uber works. You get on the app, mention your location and where you want to go, and suddenly — within a minute or two — a purportedly private citizen will be by to pick you up for a fee often less (but not always) than a traditional cab company.

The “Big Money People” have already fallen in love with Uber for setting us all free from horrid taxicab cartels that drive up the cost of transportation in our major cities. It theoretically deputizes anyone with a car as a rideshare operator capable of earning a living taking people around, making their own hours and fee schedule.

Except that’s not quite what I saw when using Uber last week. I was picked up in a late-model Mercedes SUV by a guy who spoke no English and required my GPS help to get me to my location. He was clearly an employee of someone who owned a fleet of luxury cars.

If Uber is no longer the “People’s Transportation Service,” then what is it really? A potentially union-busting, illegally operating fraud, that’s what.

Then there is VRBO. The promise here is the consolidation of people with an extra room in their home or a spare property onto a single website where vacationers can go to find real properties or portions of same rather than the oft-overpriced hotel room. The vacationers maybe get a deal. The renters pick up some extra cash for something otherwise sitting empty. It’s a win-win.

But consider that I live in a condo building where the unit across from me is now being used exclusively as one of those vacation properties. The people who recently bought it own more than 20 such places. It’s just another hotel-like money stream for them. But what’s worse is that a revolving door of tourists with zero motivation to leave the area tidy — and utterly lack accountability — now live next door to me full time.

I bring this stuff up now not to depress everyone as a new year dawns, but simply as a reminder to be vigilant because things often are not what they seem. So please be careful out there, will ya?

RAY RICHMOND has covered Hollywood and the entertainment business since 1984. He can be reached via email at ray@rayrichco.com and Twitter at @MeGoodWriter.